Healing from infidelity can feel like you’re trapped in a nightmare that you can’t wake up from. One moment, everything seems stable, and the next, your world has flipped upside down. The person you trusted most in the world has betrayed you, and the pain is so raw you don’t even know where to begin putting the pieces back together.
As a therapist, I’ve supported many women navigating this painful process. I’ve seen firsthand the devastating effects of betrayal trauma—emotionally, mentally, and even physically. For many women, the pain is overwhelming, leaving them questioning their self-worth, trust in others, and future. And often, one of the most transformative tools I recommend is something simple but incredibly powerful: a support group.
How can an infidelity support group make a difference?/Why is an infidelity support group so powerful?
Infidelity is one of the most painful forms of betrayal, often leaving individuals feeling lost, overwhelmed, and in deep emotional pain. When someone you trust deeply violates your bond of security, loyalty, and commitment, it can shake the very foundation of your self-worth, your relationships, and your sense of security. Whether the betrayal is sexual, emotional, or physical, the aftermath can feel overwhelming, and healing can seem like an insurmountable task. This sexual, emotional, and attachment injury is often referred to as betrayal trauma, a term coined by Dr. Jennifer Freyd to describe the psychological and emotional harm caused by the violation of trust, especially in close relationships like marriage.
Betrayal trauma can disrupt your sense of safety, distort your reality, and lead to long-term effects like anxiety, depression, trust issues, and difficulty in future relationships. However, research has shown that engaging with positive social support during your recovery can reduce these negative effects of betrayal trauma. A support group might initially sound a little intimidating, especially if you’ve never been in one. But I’ve seen time and time again how healing a support group can be for women recovering from infidelity. These spaces provide a powerful healing environment that allows people to process their pain in a safe and empathetic space.
If you’re wondering what makes these groups so powerful, and why they can be a pivotal part of recovery, keep reading to discover how they foster healing and why they matter in your healing journey toward rebuilding trust in yourself and others.
1. You won’t have to go through the betrayal alone.
One of the most painful things about betrayal is how isolating it can feel. Betrayed partners often feel like they are carrying the weight of their pain alone, unsure who they can trust with the truth of what they’re going through. Yet, through a support group, women can find others with similar experiences—infidelity, betrayal, other breaches of trust The shared experience creates a bond that begins to break down the walls of [aloneness] attached to this wound.
For many women, knowing that someone else truly “gets it” can be a relief in itself. It’s common to feel like an outsider in the aftermath of betrayal. Friends and family may mean well, but unless they’ve been cheated on or experienced infidelity, it’s hard for them to truly get what you’re going through.
Many women choose not to share their experiences of betrayal with friends or family. This choice is often driven by a fear of stigma or a desire to protect their relationships, especially if they have decided to stay with their partner and work on healing together. Therefore, the feeling of togetherness and understanding from a support group is invaluable. [Hearing, “I understand, I’ve been there,” can be incredibly healing.] – redundant with next?
2. Your emotions will feel validated and normalized.
One of the first things I notice when I work with women healing from infidelity is how they often doubt their emotions. They wonder if they’re “overreacting” or “too emotional.” Their inner critic starts to kick in and tries to convince them that their feelings are wrong or shameful.
But there’s no such thing as “too emotional,” especially when you’ve experienced a betrayal by the person you loved most. The hurt, anger, sadness, confusion—those feelings are all normal. In a support group, you get to feel all the emotions, express them, and hear from others who feel or have felt the same way.
When you’re surrounded by women who say, “Yes, I know exactly what you’re describing. It was excruciating,” you can take a step back and breathe. It’s okay to feel everything you’re feeling. You’re not going crazy. And you can survive this.
3. You’ll learn from other women healing from infidelity.
While each person’s experience with infidelity and healing is unique, you can learn so much from others’ experiences. In an infidelity support group, women can share strategies they’ve used to cope with the aftermath, boundaries they’ve set, communication techniques they’ve learned, and resources that have helped them.
Some women might have found solace in journaling, meditation, or yoga. Conversely, others have embraced self-care and strengthened their independence through new hobbies or let out anger through kickboxing classes. Some women prefer to make or inspire change—in their home, neighborhood, or city—to honor and establish a new chapter.
A support group becomes a place of shared wisdom where participants can learn new tools for self-compassion, self-care, and moving forward. These stories from the betrayal support group aren’t just “advice.” You’ll be privy to real-world examples of how others have navigated the storm, receiving valuable insights for your own healing. Hearing other women’s stories of survival and strength can be a huge source of hope. Sometimes, knowing that someone else has been through hell and come out the other side can spark a light of possibility in your heart.
4. You can release the feelings of shame around the betrayal.
Infidelity often carries with it a sense of shame. It’s easy to feel like you’re the only one hurt in this way, like you’ve somehow failed your marriage or relationship. These feelings of shame are normal and unfortunately all too common. Because shame is disconnecting, it makes you want to hide, disappear, or avoid discussing your pain. These thoughts and feelings keep you stuck.
A support group is a safe place to break your silence. It’s a space where no one is judging you. In an infidelity support group, you don’t have to hide your tears, questions, or anger. Instead, you can share openly without fear of being blamed or misunderstood. You can release the shame that was never yours to carry in the first place. You did not cause your partner to betray you. And there is nothing you could have done to deserve being betrayed.
When a woman speaks openly about their experiences, something powerful happens: they start reclaiming their voice. No one in the betrayal group will tell you what you “should” do or what you “should” have done. They’re there to support you, listen, and let you find your path to healing.
5. An infidelity support group can help you rediscover your self-worth.
Infidelity can leave you questioning your value. You might wonder, “What’s wrong with me? Why wasn’t I enough?” I hear this question from so many women, and it pains me every time I hear it. The truth is your worth was never tied to someone else’s actions. You are enough. You are worthy of love, respect, and happiness.
In a betrayal support group, you start to hear this message, not just from your therapist, but from the women right beside you learning to believe the same thing. They will remind you of your strength, resilience, and beauty—not just as someone who’s been hurt but as a whole person. Their encouragement helps you rebuild your sense of self-worth, one step at a time. You will also have the chance to recognize their worth, resilience, strength, and beauty and remind them of these qualities as well.
A betrayal support group can be the key to healing from infidelity.
The road to healing after infidelity is long, and there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. But a support group may help you find your way. It’s a space to contemplate your future, whether that means healing with your partner or moving forward independently. The women you meet in a support group will cheer you on, no matter the path you choose. You’ll be reminded that while you can’t change the past, you do have the power to create your future.
If you’re navigating the aftermath of betrayal or infidelity, I encourage you to consider finding a support group. Whether it’s an in-person group or an online community, connecting with others on a similar path can help you heal faster and feel less alone.
And that’s the thing: you don’t have to do this alone.
If you’re interested in a monthly infidelity support group online, please reach out to schedule a consult for our Beyond Betrayal women’s group. We know this healing process requires a lot of vulnerability so we like to start with a consult call where the group leader can get to know you and your story better and answer any questions you may have before jumping in. Please fill out the form below to schedule a free 30-minute call to begin the registration process.
You deserve support, validation, and, most importantly, the opportunity to heal at your own pace. You can do this.